Spring often brings about flirty, fresh, and funky attitudes in Urban dwelling women. However, the first day of April may be met with some hesitation because no one wants to be caught actin' a fool. That is why I thought it would be fun to share some of the freakiest confessions I have received from my fans relating to April Fool's Day. These stories should get you giggling with your girl pals over a cal-free mojito* (see below for recipe) and reminding you that whatever bad luck you have recently had, its not that bad!
Beach Bummer
I had a totally mortifying moment last April Fools Day that I just cannot live down! Last April I had planned a romantic getaway at the beach with my boy toy. Since our relationship had been on the rocks, I thought I better do something totally crazy to grab my guys attention and show him how much I care. I planned a sexy beach candle lit dinner and planned to wear nothing but a sand bikini. I had purchased some special epoxy glue at the hardware store, applied it to my bikini zones and rolled in the sand to cover my lady bits. When my boyfriend came down to the beach for dinner he barely even noticed my outfit. I stood up and reached over the table to serve him some steaming hot minute rice and the sand drizzled all over his plate. He complained throughout the whole meal that his rice was gritty! When he finally noticed my sexy bikini he said: "Ariel has always been my least favourite Disney Princess". Boy oh boy do I ever wish I would have stuck with my original plan to wear a coat made of dalmatian fur.
-Brandie B
Doggy Daycare
My roommate's little brother was coming over to dog sit while my roommate went away for spring break. I have always had a crush on him and have been too shy to tell my roommate. I thought having some alone time would be a perfect way to get to know each other and maybe even fool around! The first night he came over to feed the dog I was waiting by the door wearing my brown flannelette pyjamas and the dog's collar. I thought it would be playful and cute to pretend to be a naughty dog that he needed to take for a walk. I waited on all fours by the door and when he arrived he gave me a really weird look. I got nervous and peed through my flannelettes. He slipped on the pee and dislocated his jaw. Talk about a doggy disaster!
-Cloris L.
Gas Leak
My steady Urban Stallion has been a long time prankster. On April Fool's day we decided to have a quiet night at home watching Animal Planet reruns. As we started to get snuggly I noticed the room started to smell really pungent. When I asked him if he noticed the smell he said he did and he went to check our gas metre in the basement. He came back and told me there must be a leak, but not to worry because it wasn't the deadly kind of gas. The smell got worse and worse throughout the night until I vomited and had to spend the night in the backyard in a tent to get some fresh air. The next morning my boyfriend confessed that it was him who had gas the whole time! He totally fooled me!
-Pam J.
-Pam J.
These confessions remind us to keep our Urban cool even when in the most humiliating of circumstances. To enjoy these stories with your besties think about having each friend adapt a character, create a voice, avatar, and persona and read the confessions with a silly accent!
Cal-Free Mojito
1 cup seltzer water (if you only have tap water just add bubbles by blowing through a colourful straw)
1 tbsp green food die
Garnish with a mojito
Enjoy!
Until next time,
Urban Woman
