Today's blog is dedicated to the 2014th Olympiad. There has been tons of crazy hype leading up to the games all the way from what Jennifer Lawrence will be wearing on the podium to the latest Putin toppings (did someone say extra gravy?). I have always loved cheering on the buff urban athletes from my neck of the woods because they look great in spandex onesies and they usually know the entire national anthem-unlike the other sports heroes I've crushed on in the past who usually have to hum at least a few bars.
Sochi is the host city of this Feb's games. When I think Russia I think vodka (pronounced wod-ka)! Here is an Olympic cocktail sure to win a gold!
Soooo-Totally-Chi Vodka Cocktail
-Add one ounce vodka to a blender along with a drop or two of sweat from your fave athlete-blend with snow from the polar ice caps
-serve in a trophy (I use the mini replica of the Stanley cup I won in my ladies bowling league)
-garnish with a laurel headband
-you can add food colouring to represent a person's personality or their favourite Olympic ring
My Olym-Picks
Here are my best guesses for gold this winter!
Johnny Weir
Easily confused with KD Lang, this diva can triple sow-cow like no other! His love for fine faux furs and the hetero-agenda make him a top gold medal contender. Please note his penny shaped nips which expand while he catches a chill on the ice.
The Jamaican Bobsled Team
Bobsled has always been one of my fave events because of how it titillates me. I mean, who doesn't like watching a fast moving phallus careen down an ice canal? I have high hopes for Jamaica this year because they finally put John Candy on a low carb diet.
Quatchi
The search is over Urban Women! The sasquatch was right under our noses this whole time! Hailing from Vancouver, BC, Quatchi is representin' for all the Bigfoots. He will most likely win the medal for creating happy hearts and memories!
Olympic Trendz
- Create a jazzy themed necklace by stringing red, yellow, green, blue and black lifesavers onto a piece of (used) dental floss to make an Olympic necklace
- Sport your gym clothes (paired nicely with ugg boots) in public all month to show that you too are an Olympic hopeful
- Have a marijuana cigarette with Michael Phelps
- Exchange all the window coverings in your house with either red or iron curtains
Urban Woman
